Growth Through the Mess: Building Your Path for 2025

It’s a New Year and a New Day

Every January 1st, I find myself here: reflecting on the past year, wondering how I made it through, and deciding how I want to set the tone for the one ahead. For years, I’ve embraced a tradition of choosing a single word to guide me—a touchstone for the highs, the lows, and all the messy in-between.

In 2024, my word was growth, and boy, did it deliver.

But let me tell you, growth is not as glamorous as it sounds. It’s messy, exhausting, and usually comes with a side of self-doubt. Growth is less about soaring to new heights and more about clawing your way through the mud, wondering why you signed up for this journey in the first place. Yet somehow, by the end of it, you look back and see the path you’ve laid—stone by stone, pebble by pebble.

Some stones are big, like career milestones or life-changing moments. Others are small pebbles, like quiet realizations or tiny victories that feel insignificant at the time but later guide your way. Together, they create a path, showing us where we’ve been and where we’re headed.

For me, 2024 was a year of laying this path, and nowhere was that clearer than in my role as a mom. Watching my four kids grow—ages 19 to 3—has been a front-row seat to how growth unfolds at every stage of life. Take my youngest two: Evelyn, 5, and Timmy, 3. They’re equal parts best friends and sworn rivals, and watching their relationship evolve this year has reminded me that growth isn’t just about milestones; it’s about what we learn in the spaces between them.

Life Lessons From Evelyn and Timmy

Watching Evelyn and Timmy this year was like bingeing a Netflix drama you didn’t subscribe to but can’t stop watching. One minute, they’re holding hands like two cherubs on a Hallmark card. The next, they’re locked in a gladiator-style battle over who gets to press the microwave button. Yet in their chaos, I see something profound—growth.

Let’s start with Evelyn, my five-year-old tornado of spunk. Evelyn doesn’t just walk into a room; she arrives. She’s a pint-sized powerhouse who commands attention with the confidence of a keynote speaker who has no idea what she’s talking about but somehow convinces you she’s right.

This year, her confidence met her first big hurdle: kindergarten. She embraced it like a star on her first red-carpet debut, skipping onto the bus with her signature flair. But for Timmy, her three-year-old sidekick, this was a seismic shift.

What I didn’t anticipate was the ripple effect her absence would have on him. Timmy has always been Evelyn’s shadow. They share everything: toys, snacks, and even grudges. But this year, for the first time, he had to navigate life without her.

I’ll never forget that first day. After cheering Evelyn onto the bus, we headed to his preschool drop-off—a place he’s walked into a hundred times without issue. But that day, he stood frozen at the doorway, his big eyes welling with tears. “Where’s EE?” he whispered, clutching my hand like it was his last lifeline.

In that moment, I saw his world shift. He wasn’t worried about preschool; he was worried about starting a day without his sister by his side. My heart cracked a little as I crouched down to reassure him, knowing my words could never fill the space she left behind.

But here’s the beautiful thing about growth: it happens even when we don’t feel ready for it. Over the weeks, I watched Timmy take his first tentative steps into independence. He found his rhythm, his confidence, and his own little world. And though every day ends with him climbing into the car and asking, “Let’s get EE,” he’s learning that his path—his stones and pebbles—are his own to lay.

2024: Building the Foundation

For me, 2024 wasn’t about finishing a grand project or crossing the finish line on some massive goal. It was about laying stones for the future I want to build—one thoughtful, intentional step at a time.

Some stones were big, like creating new partnerships and tackling ambitious projects that stretched me in ways I didn’t see coming. Others were small, like rekindling connections with people already in my life—those quiet, meaningful conversations that remind you why relationships matter in the first place. Together, these moments formed the foundation for the path ahead.

But not all foundations are laid on smooth ground. This year also brought monumental changes in the real estate industry. Policies shifted, practices evolved, and it often felt like we were rewriting the playbook while still running the game. Imagine trying to remodel your kitchen while hosting Thanksgiving dinner—that’s the energy we carried through 2024. It was chaotic, demanding, and relentless.

Through it all, my focus remained on the people around me. Much of my year was spent in service to others—mentoring, guiding, and ensuring my team and community had what they needed to succeed. I poured myself into helping others navigate these changes, and watching them thrive was one of the most fulfilling parts of my year. There’s nothing like seeing someone take a challenge and turn it into a win, knowing you played even a small role in their success.

But here’s the thing about constantly giving to others: if you’re not careful, it can leave you running on empty. And if I’m being honest, that’s exactly where I found myself as the year drew to a close.

By December, I realized something was missing—not from my work, but from how I was experiencing it. I had spent so much time laying the foundation, pouring myself into the future, that I forgot to pause and celebrate the stones I’d already set in place. I hadn’t taken the time to step back, breathe, and admire the path I’d worked so hard to build.

And isn’t that something so many of us do? We push forward, driven by the next goal, the next milestone, the next step, without stopping to look at how far we’ve come. We convince ourselves there’s no time to pause, that the work will never be done. But here’s what I’ve learned: the work will always be there. It’s the moments you take to reflect, celebrate, and reconnect with yourself that truly sustain you.

That realization became a turning point for me. It wasn’t about stepping away from the work—I thrive on the hustle—but about finding a way to ground myself in the process.

Why I Started This Blog (and a Slice of Cake)

For as long as I can remember, journaling has been my go-to. It’s where I unload my thoughts after a chaotic day, hash out big decisions, and occasionally write down to-do lists that I’ll never actually check off. It’s my safe space—the one place where I can be completely unfiltered.

But one day, in a rare moment of organization, I decided to flip back through some of those old entries. As I read, something hit me like a toddler throwing a shoe (trust me, that happens in my house more often than you’d think): there was a message in those pages. Stories I’d forgotten, lessons I’d learned the hard way, moments of joy I’d brushed past in the busyness of life.

And then came the scariest thought of all: What if I shared this?

Cue the panic spiral. What if nobody cares? Worse, what if people do care and think, “Wow, this lady is a hot mess”? The idea of putting my life out there for the world to see felt…vulnerable. Vulnerable like “accidentally sending a text to the wrong person” vulnerable.

So, like any responsible adult, I shelved the idea and went back to pretending I didn’t have the urge to write publicly. That’s when Valerie Garcia stepped in—or rather, her book did.

Meeting Valerie and Finding the Courage

I first met Valerie years ago when she spoke at a conference I attended. Let me tell you, she had me hooked within five minutes. Her authenticity, humor, and storytelling felt like a giant permission slip to be human. She had this uncanny ability to make you laugh so hard your mascara smudged, then turn around and drop a truth bomb that left you reevaluating your entire life.

After that, I became a full-blown fangirl. I’ve brought her in to speak to my team multiple times over the years because her ability to connect is unmatched. And when her book, We’re Gonna Need Cake, landed in my lap this summer, it couldn’t have come at a better time.

The book is like sitting down with your funniest, most honest friend who isn’t afraid to call out your nonsense but does it with so much love you can’t help but listen. Valerie reminded me that it’s okay to show up with all my flaws and quirks on display. Sharing your story doesn’t make you weak; it makes you relatable.

Her words hit me hard. Here I was, hesitating to start something I knew could make an impact, all because I was afraid of being seen as anything less than perfect. Valerie’s book flipped that script for me. Life isn’t about perfection; it’s about showing up as you are, messiness and all.

The Blog Becomes a Reality

So, I took the leap. This blog went from an idea I’d been tiptoeing around for years to a reality that has become one of the most rewarding things I’ve done. Writing these posts feels like inviting you into my kitchen for a cup of coffee—except it’s probably cold because someone yelled “Moooom!” and I forgot about it.

This blog has been a way for me to connect with you, to share the stories and lessons that have shaped me, and to remind myself (and maybe you too) that we’re all just figuring it out as we go. It’s therapeutic, it’s grounding, and most of all, it’s authentic.

Valerie’s book gave me the confidence to embrace that authenticity. Her reminder that life is beautifully imperfect gave me the push I needed to hit publish for the first time. And honestly? I haven’t looked back.

If you’re looking for a book to add to your 2025 reading list, We’re Gonna Need Cake is it. It’s the perfect companion for when you need a laugh, a cry, or just a reminder that you’re not alone in the beautifully messy chaos of life.

Looking Ahead to 2025

As I step into 2025, my focus is shifting. It’s not just about showing up for others—it’s about showing up for myself. That might sound selfish at first glance, but here’s the truth I’ve come to realize: when you show up for yourself, you show up better for everyone else.

Think about it. When was the last time you asked yourself what you really want? Not what you think you should want, or what everyone else expects you to want, but what you truly, deeply desire?

For years, I told myself that giving everything to others was enough—that as long as my family, my team, and my community were thriving, I was thriving. And while that’s partly true (seeing others succeed genuinely fills my cup), there’s another part of the equation I’d been ignoring: me.

This year, I’m determined to get back to the heart of what I want for myself. I’m talking about the kind of joy that makes you laugh until your stomach hurts, the kind of purpose that makes you leap out of bed in the morning (or at least shuffle to the coffee maker with enthusiasm).

What Stones Are You Laying?

2025, for me, is about laying those stones with intention. I want to build a path that’s not just functional but beautiful—one that reflects who I am and where I want to go.

Some stones will be big, like pursuing opportunities that scare me just enough to know they matter. Others will be small pebbles—like saying “no” to the things that drain me or taking five minutes in the middle of a chaotic day to breathe, reset, and remind myself that peace begins with me.

But here’s the thing about laying stones: you have to decide where you want the path to lead. That’s the question I’m challenging myself to answer this year. And I want to challenge you to do the same.

Where are you headed? What do you want your path to look like—not the one someone else laid out for you, but the one that feels authentically yours?

Dreaming Bigger and Showing Up Authentically

This year, I’m also dreaming bigger. I want to share my message in ways that stretch me, excite me, and, yes, maybe even terrify me a little. I want to lean into new opportunities that align with my purpose, knowing that every step I take adds another stone to the path I’m building.

But dreaming bigger doesn’t mean abandoning the foundation I’ve already laid. In fact, it means honoring it. Every late night, every hard conversation, every lesson learned in 2024 has prepared me for this next chapter. And I plan to carry those lessons with me, letting them guide me as I move forward.

It also means showing up authentically—not the polished, picture-perfect version of myself, but the real one. The one who sometimes forgets the coffee pot is empty, the one who still hasn’t figured out how to pack lunches without smushed sandwiches, and the one who knows that life is messy but chooses to embrace it anyway.

Because when I show up as me, I create space for others to do the same. And isn’t that what we all want? To feel seen, understood, and encouraged to keep building, even when the path gets rocky?

What Do You Truly Want?

As we step into this new year, I invite you to reflect. Not just on what you hope to achieve, but on what you truly want. What would your life look like if you gave yourself permission to dream a little bigger, to say “yes” to joy, and to let go of the things that no longer serve you?

If you’re anything like me, it might feel uncomfortable at first—like stepping onto an unpaved path with no map. But here’s the beauty of it: you get to lay the stones. You get to decide where they lead.

So, grab your metaphorical toolbox and start building. And remember, the path doesn’t have to be perfect. Sometimes the most meaningful stones are the ones laid in the middle of life’s messiest moments.

Let’s Build Something Beautiful Together

This year, I’m showing up for myself so I can show up better for you—for my family, my team, and everyone who finds themselves reading these words.

And I’m excited to continue this journey with you. Through this blog, through new projects, and through the quiet moments of connection that remind us why we’re here.

So here’s to 2025: a year of growth, joy, and intentionality. Let’s build paths that reflect who we are and where we want to go. Let’s embrace the stones, the pebbles, and even the occasional misstep.

And let’s do it together.

Now, it’s your turn. What do you want your 2025 to look like? What stones will you lay this year? Drop a comment, share your word for the year, or simply take a moment to reflect. Let’s inspire each other to build something beautiful.